Mama's Dramas

Thursday, June 06, 2013

Isn't it ironic.....

Lukas has had this amazing opportunity to spend one afternoon a week with enthusiastic, bright young naturalists in the woods.  He learns about edible plants and tracking and bird activity.  He comes home smelling of campfires and covered in dirt.  It is awesome.  This past week was his last week and the group did a closing circle.  All the kids went around and reflected what they were grateful for and what their highlights were.  We shared snacks and sang songs.  It felt exactly like what I want for my children.
After the circle Lukas looked up at me.  He had been hanging on my arms and cuddling and he said...
"Mama, do you know what I really want to do?"
"What?"  I replied as I stroked his sandy blonde hair.
"I want to go on a Disney Cruise."
The theme music to my wholesome family movie came to a screeching halt and I burst out laughing.
"No.  I really want to go.  You ride around on a big boat and there are rides and games and sweets and it's really fun." 
Kids around us were wrestling in the mud and battling with sticks and eating popcorn and watermelon. 
"Where did you learn about this?"  I asked as if by discovering the root of the cause I could separate this desire from my child.
"At school.  I really want to go.  I think it is less expensive than going on a plane to Florida to the real Disneyworld and I don't mind just going on the cruise instead."
Sigh.  Big Sigh.  Could it be that my visions of the perfect childhood experience, one spent around campfires with storytellers, one where you learn how to carve wood and identify edibles and watch the mud thaw is not a shared vision with my child?  He already has declared his favorite things to be movies, sweets and friends.  Why not love those things?  They are great.  So he wants to go on a Disney Cruise.....another sigh......let me digest that....he wants to go on a Disney Cruise?! 
I told him "No.  Never.  There is nothing that I would like less than that."  Perhaps that was too extreme.  Perhaps there can be space for both of our visions.  Perhaps one does not preclude the other.  After all....many Disney characters live in the woods....make fires......and despite their ability to walk and talk and have human dramas are even animals themselves......
Maybe I need to take a deep breath and let him explore all the landscape of the world.....even the landscape created in the world of Disney.  Sigh.